Comments on: Ask the Readers: How Do You Establish Financial Union with Your Spouse? http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/ True Financial Freedom Wed, 08 Feb 2012 21:15:02 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Payday instant loans http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/comment-page-1/#comment-16751 Payday instant loans Wed, 11 Aug 2010 08:00:24 +0000 http://onemoneydesign.com/blog/?p=9602#comment-16751 I don't thing that it should matter that we maintain Financial Union with our spouse or not for what ever reason. I believe marriage is about two people and not about their bank balances. So one should focus on their personal relation rather than their financial balances. <a href="http://www.paydayin1hour.co.uk/" rel="nofollow">Payday instant loans</a> I don’t thing that it should matter that we maintain Financial Union with our spouse or not for what ever reason. I believe marriage is about two people and not about their bank balances. So one should focus on their personal relation rather than their financial balances.

Payday instant loans

]]> By: Wedding Roundup – August 6, 2010 | Savvy Cinderella http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/comment-page-1/#comment-15963 Wedding Roundup – August 6, 2010 | Savvy Cinderella Fri, 06 Aug 2010 16:37:28 +0000 http://onemoneydesign.com/blog/?p=9602#comment-15963 [...] One Money Design offers ideas on how to establish a financial union. [...] [...] One Money Design offers ideas on how to establish a financial union. [...]

]]> By: Friday Roundup http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/comment-page-1/#comment-14801 Friday Roundup Fri, 30 Jul 2010 08:03:06 +0000 http://onemoneydesign.com/blog/?p=9602#comment-14801 [...] Over at One Money Design, Jason discusses the importance of a financial union with your spouse [...] [...] Over at One Money Design, Jason discusses the importance of a financial union with your spouse [...]

]]> By: Peter http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/comment-page-1/#comment-14603 Peter Thu, 29 Jul 2010 15:19:30 +0000 http://onemoneydesign.com/blog/?p=9602#comment-14603 After having written about personal finance from a Christian perspective for a couple of years now, I've found that this is often one of the most contentious issues I've come across that Christian couples deal with. In fact I've dealt with this in my own marriage to a degree as well. There can be a lot of reasons why a spouse doesn't want to share finances when married. 1. Distrust - there is sometimes distrust in a relationship because one spouse has mis-managed money in the past, or has had issues that would cause the other to mis-trust them. 2. Selfishness - often one spouse is selfish and doesn't want to admit that they're in a marriage now where two become one - they want to just continue spending as if they were single - and spend on whatever they want. 3. Underlying communication issues - There can be underlying communication issues causing the husband and wife not to be connecting on some level, meaning one spouse doesn't feel like their needs are being met. In my marriage I know I wasn't making my wife feel "cared for" and that resulted in her building up defenses and trying to care for herself by having her own accounts where she knew what was going on. Much of this was solved by more open communication, sharing of feelings more often and making sure my wife knew I was taking care of things in a way that she knew I had her best interests at heart. In any event, whatever the underlying cause, there may be some need for counseling in the marriage as usually money is just the surface issue, and there is something else underlying the tension that is causing the unity to be lost. After having written about personal finance from a Christian perspective for a couple of years now, I’ve found that this is often one of the most contentious issues I’ve come across that Christian couples deal with. In fact I’ve dealt with this in my own marriage to a degree as well. There can be a lot of reasons why a spouse doesn’t want to share finances when married.

1. Distrust – there is sometimes distrust in a relationship because one spouse has mis-managed money in the past, or has had issues that would cause the other to mis-trust them.
2. Selfishness – often one spouse is selfish and doesn’t want to admit that they’re in a marriage now where two become one – they want to just continue spending as if they were single – and spend on whatever they want.
3. Underlying communication issues – There can be underlying communication issues causing the husband and wife not to be connecting on some level, meaning one spouse doesn’t feel like their needs are being met.

In my marriage I know I wasn’t making my wife feel “cared for” and that resulted in her building up defenses and trying to care for herself by having her own accounts where she knew what was going on. Much of this was solved by more open communication, sharing of feelings more often and making sure my wife knew I was taking care of things in a way that she knew I had her best interests at heart.

In any event, whatever the underlying cause, there may be some need for counseling in the marriage as usually money is just the surface issue, and there is something else underlying the tension that is causing the unity to be lost.
Peter recently posted..Devotional- Godliness With Contentment Is Great WealthMy Profile

]]> By: Joe Plemon http://www.onemoneydesign.com/ask-the-readers-how-do-you-establish-financial-union-with-your-spouse/comment-page-1/#comment-14593 Joe Plemon Thu, 29 Jul 2010 13:46:15 +0000 http://onemoneydesign.com/blog/?p=9602#comment-14593 Jason, This isn't a money issue; it is a marriage issue. The reader said that he and his wife have always have always "been plagued with communication difficulties". If the underlying issues are not dealt with, having a joint account would be a superficial fix. As you recommended, they need to seek some marriage counseling. Jason,
This isn’t a money issue; it is a marriage issue. The reader said that he and his wife have always have always “been plagued with communication difficulties”. If the underlying issues are not dealt with, having a joint account would be a superficial fix. As you recommended, they need to seek some marriage counseling.
Joe Plemon recently posted..Guidelines and Tax Saving Tips Pertaining to Retirement SavingsMy Profile

]]>