Do Females Have a Fear of Finances?

OK ladies, let’s talk….

Gentlemen, I know you’re curiosity is going to compel you to read on and that’s fine.  Will you do me a favor and share with a woman that you love (mother, sister, spouse)?  Thanks!

Ladies, our presence in the workforce has increased from one generation to the next.  In the United States, women now make up about half the total workforce and has seen a sharp rise in income as well.    There are more women in managerial positions, and more women-owned businesses than ever before.  The number of female millionaires is on the rise, and as of a 1995 report, 55% of women were bringing home half or more of the household income, shifting the traditional role of “bread winner”.

Countless women are graduating top of their class, holding positions or power within government, and working upper managerial positions.  We have shown we have the intelligence, charisma, leadership and know how to lead along with our male counterparts.

So then why do a staggering 90% of women feel insecure when it comes to their own finances?!

These are the same women that are bringing home more income.  They dress the part, talk the talk and walk the walk, but on the inside, there is this intimidation caused by money.

There’s a particular woman that was classified as gifted from a child.  While in kindergarten, she was on a 2^nd grade reading level.  She scored a 140 on her IQ test and went to the college preparatory school for the gifted and talented that at one point was ranked 4^th in the nation.  She went on to a predominately male engineering university to continue studying her love for computers.  Like many of her undergraduate counterparts, she graduated with her share of debt.  Minimum and missed payments were the lifestyle.  She had a good job, and no matter how behind she got, another paycheck was always a couple weeks away.

This dangerous cycle continued for a few years until one day she woke up and decided to make some major changes.  Her IQ and education did not factor into basic personal finance principals.  Yet she meticulously handled major projects and programs in the workforce.  Even when she tried to do the right thing by going to a financial advisor, her lack of understanding and fear of looking incompetent caused her to remain silent.  She wasn’t looking to manage her money, she was looking for a financial baby-sitter.  In case you haven’t figured it out by now, that woman was me.

I’ve seen this story all to often!  Women with a commanding presence in a conference room, responsible for leading large teams, successfully overseeing multi-million dollar projects and yet refuse to take control of their own finances.

This anomaly doesn’t just effect women in corporate America.  The same insecurities are voiced from those who choose to work part-time or stay at home.

Suze Orman asked the question in Women & Money: Why is it women who are competent in all other areas of their lives cannot find the same competence when it comes to matters of money?

In fact, her book Women & Money is largely based on this question.  It is a book I plan to provide a review on in the near future.  But for now, let’s reflect on the question above.

Competence in Money Matters

I believe it comes down to at least two issues:

1. Fear / Lack of Confidence
2. Conflicting nurturer and money matters

Fear / Lack of Confidence

Fear can be an immobilizing force!  Fear of failure and even fear of success will prevent women from moving.  Fear of failure is obvious, but fear of success may need a little more explaining.  Because of the defined roles placed by our society, some may choose to stay within a safe zone rather than push the limit.  For a very long time and still to some extent today, there was a negative stigma that followed successful women in the workforce.  Their placement was often questioned and met with hostile accusations of favoritism and quotas.  This same fear of success cause children to intentionally receive average and sub-par grades to be accepted by a group of their peers.  Normal is comfortable, and many choose to stay there even if it means living below their potential.

Conflicting Nurturer & Money Matters

Jay MacDonald from Bankrate.com summed it up nicely with this observation:

Women: trained to nurture and seek acceptance, view money as a means to create a lifestyle. Women spend on things that enhance day-to-day living. Theirs is a now-money orientation.

Men: trained to fix and provide, view money as a means to capture and accumulate value. Men don’t spend, they invest. Men don’t want something, they need it. Theirs is a future-money orientation.

I agree with this in part, but I know too many men that spend on lifestyle enhancement to accept this as 100% fact.  For what it’s worth, here is my conclusion on the matter:

Women being nurturers have a natural ability to care for what they love.  This is most obvious in the care of a mother for a child.  However, we don’t love money, and from a Christian perspective, we should not love money:  For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. – 1 Timothy 6:10

Because of this, many have consciously (or unconsciously) shunned any type of money relationship as a topic that is taboo and better left undiscussed. However, this is unhealthy as well. Biblically, we should not love money, however, we are not commanded to ignore it. In fact, effective stewardship means it requires our attention. We need to change our views from money being avoided because it is something we don’t love, to a tool that can be effectively managed to help us take care of the ones we love.

What about you? Have you noticed an difference in the way men and women handle finances?

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